Postum

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Postum was a powdered coffee substitute sold by the Kraft Foods company. It was a kind of roasted grain beverage. The caffeine-free beverage mix was originally created by company founder C. W. Post in 1895 and marketed as a healthy alternative to coffee. Post was a Seventh-day Adventist and a student of Dr. John Harvey Kellogg who felt caffeine was unhealthy, and thus created an alternative of mostly wheat and molasses. Postum is no longer available; it was discontinued in winter of 2007.^[1]^[2] The ingredients in Postum are wheat bran, wheat, molasses, and corn dextrin.

[edit] Postum in popular culture

Postum was sometimes marketed by an invisible cartoon ghost named, "Mister Coffee Nerves," who would appear in situations wherein normal human characters were shown in uncomfortable life-situations (e.g. irritability, lack of sleep, loss of athletic prowess) due to their use of coffee and its negative effects. These cartoons always ended with the humans switching to Postum and Mister Coffee Nerves running away until the next cartoon. James Lileks has a collection of these cartoons on his website. ^[1]

In the Seinfeld episode entitled "The Pez Dispenser", George recites a list of conversation topics. One of them is "Why isn't Postum a more popular drink?", to which Jerry responds, "Yeah, Postum is underrated."

In the book Tips On Having a Gay (ex) Boyfriend by Carrie Jones, an author from Maine, the main character Belle Philbrick drinks Postum because caffeine makes her have seizures. In the book Belle writes "Tips about Postum"

1. Postum is the elixir of the blue-hair set. Even brand new cans look like they come from the 1950s. There's a dried-up label with old-fashioned block-style lettering that says, "Postum, Instant Hot Beverage. Original. Full-Bodied Taste. Naturally Caffeine Free."
2. Postum mixing is an exacting experience. If you submerge the spoon into the hot water, the brown grains adhere to the metal becoming a brownish sludge reminiscent of dog diarrhea. I do not ever think about what it does to the lining of my esophagus and stomach. Some thing you are better off not knowing.
3. The simplest way is to pre-heat your cup with hot water, then add postem to the empty cup before filling with hot water. Add some whole milk and you have a very satisfying drink indeed.
4. Sit and enjoy the combination of water, wheat bran, wheat molasses, and maltodextrin [from corn].
5. Fend off the curious who gawk and say, "What the hell is that?"
6. Hide beneath the cafeteria table and finish your drink away from the demanding crowds.

In the episode 3F14 of The Simpsons, "Homer the Smithers", Homer Simpson is the replacement for Waylon Smithers, and Montgomery Burns throws a glass at Homer, remarking: "Do you call this Postum?"